by Heath Lynch, Contributing Writer
Happy new year, everyone! As Father Time keeps the clock rolling, we turn over a new month, which means it’s time for a new Oscars: What if, where we take a look at the Oscars from years gone by and see what could’ve been. In case you’re new to this series, we look at categories the Academy should be honoring, but for one reason or another, they aren’t. Hopefully someday the Academy will do right by these creative talents, but until then, we must do their job for them. Let’s look back at the year of the infamous Live Aid simulcast concerts, the historic Route 66 being removed from the US Highway System (i.e., one of the inspirational moments behind the movie Cars), the Nintendo Entertainment System being released in North America, Microsoft releasing Windows OS version 1.0, and Michael Jordan being named the NBA’s Rookie of the Year. It is time to examine the films of 1985, celebrated at the Oscars in 1986. Let’s see what could have been!
Best Stunts and Choreography
Given to the best achievement in dance, stunts, related performances, and overall choreography for film.
And the nominees are… Back to the Future, Come and See, Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, Police Story, A View to a Kill
And the winner is… Police Story!
This was actually a stacked year for stunt work. There were more than these five films that could’ve been nominated, and each of these nominated films has a few scenes that are worthy of winning the award. In the end, the gold goes to Police Story and the absolutely bonkers work that Jackie Chan and his crew are accomplishing here. There’s a scene where Chan is hanging off the side of a bus by means of an umbrella as the bus is flying down a highway. Another where he uses a string of Christmas lights to slide down four stories in a matter of seconds. Even one where several cars drive at high speeds down a huge hill… and through a hillside village. No, like literally through a village. Cars going straight through houses and demolishing buildings. This movie is insane when it comes to stunt work, and all the more impressive that Chan is doing so much of the work himself. A well deserved Oscar win.
Best Performance by Voiceover or Motion Capture
Given to the best off screen voice performance, or on screen motion captured performance, for film.
And the nominees are… Brian Henson as Jack Pumpkinhead in Return to Oz, John Hurt as The Horned King in The Black Cauldron, Frank Oz as Various in Sesame Street: Follow That Bird, Caroll Spinney as Various in Sesame Street: Follow That Bird, James Whitmore as Mark Twain in The Adventures of Mark Twain
And the winner is… Caroll Spinney as Various in Sesame Street: Follow That Bird!
The Jim Henson machine is at it once again, but this time the honor goes to a new nominee from the group, Caroll Spinney. Up unto this point, The Muppets have received most of Henson’s attention, but now we have the first Sesame Street feature film, and Spinney provides the voice work for Bruno the Trashman, Oscar the Grouch, and the titular Big Bird. This is such a diverse range of characters requiring a wide range of vocal talents. But more than that, Spinney has to also carry the film as its lead protagonist. There’s wonder, energy, and love in this performance, and all of that comes together to make the heart of this film.
Best Performance by an Ensemble Cast
Given to the best overall ensemble cast performance for film.
And the nominees are… After Hours, Brazil, The Breakfast Club, Clue, The Color Purple
And the winner is… The Color Purple!
Not going to lie, I had a harder time cutting Ran out of the nominations for this Oscar than I had naming The Color Purple the winner. This was a slam dunk. The film already had three Oscar nominated actresses in Whoopi Goldberg, Oprah Winfrey, and Margaret Avery, all of whom deliver transformative and iconic performances. Goldberg is especially jaw dropping in her true cinematic debut. There’s also outstanding work from the likes of Danny Glover, Willard E. Pugh, Adolph Caeser, and Dana Ivey. But it’s more than these individuals; it’s the whole. The way everyone in this cast bounces off each other is tremendous. The chemistry here, and the emotion and empathy that this cast generates, will leave you gobsmacked. If anything, it’s nice to give this award to The Color Purple because this amazing picture was infamously snubbed in the other 11 categories it was nominated for. Happy to finally right this wrong.
Best Directorial Debut
Given to the best achievement in direction by a debut directing talent for film.
And the nominees are… Tim Burton for Pee-wee’s Big Adventure, Stuart Gordon for Re-Animator, Savage Steve Holland for Better Off Dead, Tom Holland for Fright Night, Jonathan Lynn for Clue
And the winner is… Tim Burton for Pee-wee’s Big Adventure!
Even if you’re not a personal fan, it’s hard to deny the massive impact Tim Burton has had on film, as well as pop culture, and it all started here with the wildly eccentric Pee-wee’s big Adventure. It’s not easy to make a feature length absurdist comedy that’s an adaptation of the classic Bicycle Thieves, which stars an adult who’s portraying a child-like character, that’s supposed to be appealing to kids and adults alike. That’s no small feat, but Burton pulls it off with whimsy. This movie has more style, unique costumes, and creative set designs than you could fathom. It falls in line with some of the trademark stylizations that Burton would later be known for. It shows his range of working with oddball performers and bringing to life bizarre characters in quirky stories. Overall, Burton’s unique energy and vision is on full display throughout this film, and it deserves some Oscar love.
Best Popular Film
Given to the best audience supported motion picture that earned a spot as one of the top 25 box office films of the year.
And the nominees are… Back to the Future, The Color Purple, The Goonies, Rocky IV, Witness
And the winner is… Back to the Future!
This almost went to The Color Purple once again. Almost. But I figure, one, spread the love. And two, how could I possibly deny the juggernaut that is the Back to the Future? While it may not be as critically lauded as The Color Purple from an awards perspective, the film is no slouch. It received great reviews for the time, and has since been reevaluated throughout the years to be considered an absolute classic. It also received four Oscar nominations for Best Original Screenplay, Best Sound, and Best Original Song, with “The Power of Love,” and even went on to win an Oscar for Best Sound Effects Editing. And as stated earlier, winning an Oscar was something The Color Purple (egregiously) never pulled off. Beyond critical acclaim, Back to the Future was the undisputed box office king, drawing $210.6 million at the domestic box office, a whole $60.2 million more than the runner-up. The flick made $381.1 million to become the world-wide box office champ as well. Plus, as we all know, we got a couple more films several years later, turning this story into one of the better film trilogies ever made. That’s not even taking into consideration the cool time travel storyline that had the world wondering what it would be like to meet their parents in their youth, the quotable lines that infected the social zeitgeist, and the everlasting pop culture impact that this film had. From commercial, to critical, to social impact, Back to the Future nailed it all, and is our rightful Best Popular Film of this year.
Another month, another year, of looking at what could’ve been. It was a fun trip down memory lane as we looked at one of the greatest war films ever made in Come and See, one of the greatest zombie films ever made in Re-Animator, and one of the greatest time travel films ever made in the infinitely entertaining Back to the Future. It was a stacked year of legendary classics. Be sure to come back again for the next article when we look at films like Stand by Me, Aliens, and Platoon. Next month we return to the Oscars of 1987, celebrating the films of 1986!
You can read more from Heath Lynch, and follow him on Letterboxd