by Shane Conto

Well the end of October seems to be the perfect time to release a remake, isn’t it? Many people look back fondly at that original film adaptation of The Witches. Roald Dahl is a beloved writer of darker children’s novels and many of the film adaptations of his books have not been able to capture the spirit of the tone and story. Not every film can be quite like Fantastic Mr. Fox, can it? The Nicolas Roeg directed film was able to capture the dark sense of the novel. Angelica Huston was also a fantastic delight as the Grand High Witch. But enough about that film. What about this one? Well…it is not quite that one. Honestly, it is hard to take any of this film very seriously. To be honest, it is really silly. But that can be a good thing, right?

Robert Zemeckis has never been known to have a particularly dark tone to his work.

But his recent work has definitely struggled tonally. Welcome to Marwen had one of the strangest conflicting tones of any movie in recent years. But was Zemeckis able to deliver on the appropriate tone for The Witches? If you are expecting the same feel as the book or the original film, then no. If you want a silly and goofy romp of a Halloween film to show your kids, Zemeckis has you covered. The strangest thing about the film is that the direction has zero signs of Zemeckis. It lacks his energy and style at all. Anyone could have directed this film. There are also some aspects that really pull it down as well. The CGI? The effects are pretty bad for a decent sized budget. This film feels more like a streaming film than it should for a film that was meant for theaters to begin with. But at least Alan Silvestri absolutely kills it with his impeccable and moving score.

Zemeckis takes his turn at screenwriting as well with The Witches and delivers many by-the-numbers trappings.

There are a few endearing moments, especially between our young protagonist and his grandmother, which make you care about the two characters. Grandma is by far the most interesting character in the film with Octavia Spencer adding so many layers to her. Spencer’s performance is raw, fun, and just endlessly relatable. We all want a grandma like her. She does get dealt plenty of expositional dialogue, but she adds a flair which makes it easier to digest. The witches on the other-hand are very bland. There is no characterization at all (except for extremely creepy designs), but the one saving grace is Anne Hathaway. Hathaway is an extremely talented actor and really chews it up in this film. If it wasn’t for her energy and oozing charisma, the character wouldn’t really work. The narration can be extremely heavy-handed but Chris Rock…well is Chris Rock so he makes it at least fun. Poor Stanley Tucci though is completely wasted.

But at least this has Dahl’s great story to lean back on, right?

Unfortunately, the plot points lean heavily into generic CGI adventure sequences and “tense” moments. One gag after another with badly rendered CGI mice gets old quick (the score certainly adds some energy to them, though). But the ending is anticlimactic. The resolution to take down the witches feels flimsy and rushed to the point where it is confusing that the film is wrapping up so quickly. But wait, there is more! The final moments (which I will not spoil) are so odd and over-the-top (yes even for this movie) that it feels so out of place. 

You must think I hated this film?

I was not mad…just disappointed. There was so much talent involved from all aspects of the film. But when all was said and done, it just feels passable. Hathaway, Spencer, and Silvestri deserve so much more. They brought their A-games to a film that feels much more average. They certainly elevate it the best they can! I guess what is most important is that you will probably have some fun (especially with the kids).

Grade: C