by Jake Bourgeois, Contributing Writer
How quick is it possible for a movie to just completely evaporate from your brain?
It’s perhaps a question for the philosophers, but one Damsel tries oh so hard to answer.
The newest streaming original from Netflix sees Stranger Things star Millie Bobbie Brown portraying Princess Elodie. Her arranged marriage to a seemingly stereotypical prince (Nick Robinson) can possibly rescue her kingdom, but instead, she finds the royal family has recruited her as a sacrifice to repay an ancient debt with a dragon. Supporting Brown are Robin Wright as Elodie’s monster-in-law-to-be, Angela Bassett as her stepmother, and Ray Winstone as her father.
The big problem is there’s nothing in the script from writer Dan Mazeau — a scribe whose only other writing credits are the cinematic masterpieces Fast X and Wrath of the Titans — to sink your teeth into. While such a story may have been groundbreaking a decade or two ago, simply flipping fairy tales on their heads and calling that “original” isn’t enough anymore. That’s been Disney’s bit in their animated offerings for 15 years at this point. Just two years ago, another major streamer literally released an original film that does the whole “badass princess fighting against her evil suitors” thing. Netflix is even repeating the twist about who the “true monster” is in the film that they themselves did better just last year. (You know, in the movie that was up for an Oscar the same weekend this movie debuted.)
Everything Damsel does has been done better elsewhere. I just saw it, and I already can’t remember much outside of the cookie-cutter plot synopsis about the trials and tribulations of… of… Princess… Melody?
She may be leading this film, but Brown herself is not to blame here. I’ve seen enough from her in Netflix’s own Enola Holmes and its sequel to know she’s got the requisite charisma to lead her own action film. She does what she can in Damsel, but there’s not much to work with. Plus, she’s not alone. This is a cast which includes a two-time Academy Award nominee in Bassett and a multi-Emmy nominee in Wright. Then there’s Winstone, who showed me literally the very same weekend how much fun he can have when he’s actually allowed to in a Netflix project with The Gentlemen spinoff series of the same name. None of them are able to rise above the script either. Nobody’s giving a bad performance, per se, but there’s only so much anybody can do if they’re not given anything to work with.
Visually, this movie is incredibly frustrating. There’s clearly talent behind the camera. Director Juan Carlos Fresnadillo is Oscar-nominated for a previous live-action short he directed. Cinematographer Larry Fong has shot some good-looking movies, like Super 8 and 300. To their credit, there’s some striking use of color. At times, the cinematography, particularly when bathing the scene in shades of blue and orange, pops. At others, the visual effects look like something from 20 years ago. Given the way the film makes lava appear — sorry, make that fire — makes me questions whether or not it was intentional, and I don’t know which would be worse. The fire literally behaves more like a liquid than it does a flame coming out of the dragon’s mouth. It’s incredibly distracting.
Damsel isn’t bad enough to make me angry or hate myself for turning it on. Unfortunately, performances that aren’t “bad” and the occasional pretty picture aren’t enough to really keep my attention either.
Rating: It Was Just Okay
Damsel is currently streaming on Netflix
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