by Frank Kemp, Contributing Writer
First of all, let us get this out of the way right off the bat: Clifford The Big Red Dog is a KIDS’ movie, intended for KIDS — KIDS who do not really look at movies the same way a 36-year-old white male will. Like every movie intended for KIDS, it is totally passable. It would have been nice to include a note from one of my kids in this review, but they didn’t watch it with me, because I love them. They can decide for themselves if they want to watch this movie. If you have a kid and they want to watch it, just let them, it’s mostly harmless. Mostly.
Now, for the segment of this review where it’s from the POV of a white guy who this movie was not intended for and is going to give his thoughts on it, because that’s what most of the internet is these days. White people speaking out of pocket. Clifford The Big Red Dog is a triumph of lazy, by-the-numbers filmmaking, and is an achievement of adapting an existing IP to the big screen. From five-time Academy Award watcher Walt Becker, director of Alvin & The Chipmunks: Road Chip, the Spider-Man 2 of the Alvin Saga.
We have our IP, Clifford, who finds success with a surrogate family, but then is hunted down by an evil white guy businessman who wants to exploit the animal for financial gain. Okay, that’s the same plot as the first Alvin & The Chipmunks movie, but whatevs. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. The film is rated PG, most likely for some of the mild humor they put in for the adults, but it was pretty much low hanging fruit to begin with. HAHAHAHA The Big Red Dog is taking a big pee on a tree! HAHAHAHAHAHA the guy got splashed with dog pee! Rolling in the aisles humor right there. Where was I? Yeah, this movie is what it is. At least everyone involved in the making of this movie (minus the studio) made money from it, and honestly what’s wrong with that? Sometimes a paycheck just needs to be a paycheck.
I could go on more about this movie and talk about spoilers and mixed messages it carries, but come on. The movie has been out for a couple weeks on Paramount+, and I honestly forgot I was supposed to review it let alone that it came out. If you really want to see this movie, you already have. If you’re the kind of person that was waiting to see this until you found out what a SiftPop writer has to say on this movie, use coupon code “couponcause” on betterhelp.com for 10 percent off your first month.
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